It seems that everything is fine: you are together, you are happy, you have plans, and, apparently, you do not have any problems. You told each other almost all the secrets and learned about the previous relationship all that can be learned - it's so interesting, especially to her. Your girlfriend agreed that the girl who left you was a bitch, and you called her ex-boyfriend a bastard several times for the joy of your lover. And suddenly this bastard began to appear in your life. Maybe, you even have already seen him flirting with woman you love! Do not rush to get upset and scream “my girlfriend is friends with her ex” to all the world around.
How should you react? Let’s find it out together.
First it turned out that half a year ago he had forgotten his sweater at her place, then - that they accidentally collided with your girlfriend in the subway, then - that he was not such a bastard, and in general, he needs help now. And now your girlfriend is already running to drink a glass of champagne with him because "he is not a stranger to me after all" and "we are just friends". Friendship with the ex...it happens. But, to be honest, it's rare. If your girlfriend is friends with her ex, you should prepare for the worst scenario.
The worst option is secret correspondence and meetings with the ex behind your back. Perhaps this is the renaissance of their relationship, but more often it is just a game of adrenaline. But even more often the reason is in her ex, who is covered with a sense of guilt and good memories, and girls tend to be merciful to the fallen, and they like to feel their importance. Her ex needs her. And she is pleased. Especially if it was he who left her. If a girl hangs out with her ex, this may not be anything, except the triumph of her self-esteem. It may even be some type of vengeance: do you see now, what you lost, moron?
But even if it is so, think again: she hid it from you and says that she just did not want to worry you. It turns out that she does not trust you and prefers to take risky decisions from all sides on her own. In this case, you should calmly discuss everything and understand why this happens. For sure it will turn out that she has accumulated a whole heap of small unspoken grievances, the main of which is just a lack of feeling that you need and are interesting to her. The best thing you can do is hug her tightly and discuss each claim in as much detail as possible.
If communication with the ex is announced from the very beginning and he has a sacred meaning for your girlfriend: first love, a lovely professor from student life - in a word, he is a character who played a big role in her destiny and stuck in it forever, forbid your girlfriend to communicate with him is the worst thing you can do. This will certainly cause resentment and accusations of infringement of rights. You will leave, but he will remain. Because he is her eternal horcrux. This has nothing to do with love and passion - consider that this is part of her... dowry. Remember, that this does not mean that girl is still in love with her ex. Try to remain calm and have a sense of humor, but do not overdo it. Be noble, calm and self-confident.
The opposite case: a girl uses her former to make you worried because she does not have enough of your attention or just want to feel like a princess at a knight tournament. Play her game: be jealous, “accidentally” peek from whom is the incoming call on her phone, ask how is her ex doing with special pseudo-indifferent intonation. If such a game strains you, you can stop it at any moment: say that you want to meet him. Say that her friend is your friend too. Organize an evening of dating in a neutral territory, so you will not be embarrassed. Remember: this is your woman, so competently, wisely, witty and very elegantly show who is in charge here. Your girlfriend will appreciate it - the girls love it when the males fight for them.
In Conclusion
Can a girl be friends with her ex? Yes, she can. But the main thing is how you react on it. You can destroy this friendship or turn it to your profit. All you need is just correctly identify scenario of this friendship and react according to our advice.
